Famous and funny insults

Deflate yourself

You balloon.

Leave our flies alone

Who needs friends like these – a cricketing insult.

As pains in the arse go

He takes some beating.

He was a prick

And that’s paying him a compliment.

Cricketing comeback

At least I’m playing for my own country.

The wrong team

Because he was in it.

A lump of halibut

Plucked straight from the freezer.

He covers every blade of grass

But that’s because of his first touch